REASONS WHY MEN
We’ve all been there…
Butterflies and all that jazz that starts to happen when we meet someone special.
We go out, we make out, and maybe we make something else too…and then we wait. Ugh.
The damn waiting you do for these darn men!
You wait and we wait and we wait (hopefully) and by that I mean hopefully you aren’t pursuing him with phones calls ,Facebook and emails and other “chasing” type behavior.
If you are, stop immediately.
Anyhow…
You wait and wait and wait. And then nothing. Nada, zip, zilch—absolutely nothing comes our way except a big pile of disappointment when we aren’t swept off feet like we thought for sure we would be…
No more phone calls, no more dates, no more dreamy nights curled up in his arms after making sweet love for hours on end.
So, what gives?
Well I have some answers for you today.
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I asked some men about the same question in a gym's changing room..
It turns out that most every man was in total agreement and there are three reasons why women don’t get asked out on a another date.
So I wanted to touch on the top one with you today to see if you can relate—to wee if, in fact, you have made this number on mistake before (I know u have!) and give your hot little self something to think about in your relations to men.
The number one reason women don’t get asked out on a second date is: Because they’re too bossy and they override suggestions.
Now, i asked some ladies and they didn’t go into the reasons why these men said that being too bossy and overriding suggestions turns them off to the point of not wanting another date.
But I’ve been thinking—and I have some advice from not just my own dating life, but from my years of relationships up and downs and forums that has given me amazing insight on understanding men from both perspectives.
Here’s why this response doesn’t come as a bit of a surprise to me: men don’t like being told what to do. (Neither do ladies, but for different reasons.)
Men don’t like being told what to do because it offends their “Manhood”, that masculine quality about them that makes them want to be your Hero, your “Mr. Fix-it” and your masterful provider.
Imagine this scenario:
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A man asks you out and already has the night lined up. He’s picking you up at eight, and he’s taking you to this great little Italian restaurant that he’s been to before and just knows you’re going to love.
But when he calls to confirm, you tell him that you don’t want him to pick you up, you’d rather meet him at the restaurant and that you really aren’t in the mood for Italian…you’d rather have African.
Without knowing it, you’ve essentially offended his ability to provide for you, take care of your needs, and do something special for you.
You’ve offended his masculine energy, the very energy that wants to succeed, wants to win you over, and wants to impress you, too.
Your date has taken special care to think of and plan something special for you and instead of welcoming his gifts of thoughtful planning and consideration, you shoot down his thoughtful idea, taking with it his pride and manly ability to provide for you.
Get it?
I see women do this all time and don’t even realize it!
You “tell” men what to do—even when you think what u’re saying is just a “suggestion.”
You must remember that men wear different ears than women—they actually have different brains in their head, different ways of seeing and feeling and acting and thinking.
The list goes on and on and on.
So, when a man makes a plan, stick to it! He’s operating from the very core of his being, from a place that is wildly passionate about providing, finding solutions and taking care of the most important people in his life.
And don’t you want to ultimately be one of the most important people in his life?
Of course you do.
Part two coming soon... ;-)
by Joshua Mbaga.
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